Sunday, March 1, 2015

Infamous Crimes - Solved!

Fear Envelops Russia After Killing of Putin Critic Boris Nemtsov
 
Mr. Putin, in a message to Mr. Nemtsov's mother...said, "Everything will be done so that the organizers and perpetrators of a vile and cynical murder get the punishment they deserve."
 
New York Times, February 28th, 2015
 
 
 
Whitechapel District of London, April 4th, 1888
 
Sir Melville Macnaughten, Assistant Chief Constable:
Ah, Reid, good man. Thanks for coming in. You've heard, I trust, about this ghastly murder in Whitechapel? Yes?
 
Detective Inspector Edmund Reid, Metropolitan Police:
Yes sir. Grisly thing, I'm afraid.
 
Sir Melville:
Absolutely. Just the sort of thing the press likes to play up. Let's see if we can't nip that in the bud, shall we? Who have you put on the case?
 
Detective Inspector Reid:
I've put my best man on it, sir - Jack Tripper.
 
Sir Melville:
Tripper...Tripper...Why is that name so familiar to me?
 
Detective Inspector Reid:
We call him the "Murder Man," sir. He's got a real affinity for the subject. Trust me, sir, he's the man for this case.
 
 
Dallas, Texas, November 22nd, 1963
 
Dallas Police Chief, Justus Cochran:
Obviously, today has been a tragedy for the whole nation. The eyes of the entire country, the entire world, are upon us today. Of course, the federal government is going to do everything they can do to get to the bottom of this, but, by God, we need to do our part, too.
 
Dallas Police Department Chief Inspector, Walt T. Jones:
Our department is already on the case, chief. We don't want to step on the federal boys toes, but we'll work it hard from our end. I've already got our best man, Grassley, leading the local investigation.
 
Chief Cochran:
Grassley?
 
Chief Jones:
Yes, sir, Grassley. Noel Grassley. He was on the ground when the shots rang out. He's our man, alright.
 
 
Cook County, Illinois, September 14th, 1976
 
Cook County Sheriff, Hank Thomson:
Dammit, Ted, this is the fifth missing person report we've had. I've got parents and the press breathing down my neck on this. Do we have anything to show them, any progress?
 
Chief of Cook County Criminal Investigation Department, Ted Esper:
I'm afraid not. Every lead just takes us to another dead end.
 
Sheriff Thomson:
Dammit, Ted, that's not going to cut it! We need some sort of results, and we need them fast. Haven't you got anything - anything - that might pan out?
 
Chief Esper:
Well, uh, there is one thing, one approach I'd like to follow up on. Call it a hunch, if you like. But it's something that, I don't know how to explain it, but, it just seems like the right thing to do on this case.
 
Sheriff Thomson:
Yes?
 
Chief Esper:
Well, it's like this...I'd like to call in, uh, John Wayne to help with the investigation.
 
Sheriff Thomson:
You want to call in The Duke to help find these missing persons?
 
Chief Esper:
I know it sounds crazy, Hank. But I just feel that, somehow, John Wayne is the key to solving these cases.
 
Sheriff Thomson:
John Wayne? Dammit, Ted - do you want to make me look like some sort of clown?